Teacher: Why did you not study?
Me: A year has 365 days for you to study. After taking away 52 Sundays, there are only 313 days left. There are 50 days in the summer that is way too hot to work so there are only 263 days left. We sleep 8 hours a day, in a year, that counts up to 122 days so now we're left with 141 days. If we fooled around for only 1 hour a day, 15 days are gone, so we are left with 126 days. We spend 2 hours eating each day, 30 days are used in this way in the year, and we are left with 96 days in our year. We spend 1 hour a day speaking to friends and family, that takes away 15 days more and we are left with 81 days. Exams and tests take up at least 35 days in your year, hence you are only left with 46 days. Taking off approximately 40 days of holidays, you are only left with 6 days. Say you are sick for a minimum of 3 days, you're left with 3 days in the year to study! Let's say you only go out for 2 days... You're left with 1 day. But that 1 day is your birthday.
january: okay yeah man new year new me fresh starts all around i'm totally not gonna waste this year like i've done every other year of my life so far
february: well okay that went quickly but february will be my month i will get shit done
march: lol wtf wasn't it christmas yesterday
april: awww little baby birdies and shit how cute but i've still done absolutely fuck all
may: mAY THE FOURTH BE WITH YOU AH AHA HHAHAHHA AHHAHA aw shit i missed april fool's day how the fuck did that happen
june: since when is it summer
july: blogging blogging blogging blogging blogging sleeping eating blogging
august: i need to start getting shit done where has the summer gone omg
september: take me back to the fucking summer
october: HALLOFUCKINWEEN MOTHERFUCKERS
november: everything in nature's dying hmm bit of a bummer
december: chrISTMAS FUCK YEAH OMG YAY. OMG IT'S ALMOST NEXT YEAR. NEXT YEAR, THAT IS THE YEAR I WILL GET SHIT DONE. I CAN FEEL IT.